Since the 2016 election, the dinner table at my house has been a hotbed for debates, discussions and enlightenment. You see, I’m the mom of a teenager and a 20-something who both have very strong opinions—but they share their views in different ways.
My daughter has always been our pint-sized progressive. She attended the March for Our Lives protest against gun violence in Washington, D.C. She’s also an artist who creates pieces that speak to everything from police profiling to consent and gender roles. She has strong opinions on a multitude of issues, and her arguments are fueled by passion, emotion and the sense that if you’re not on her side, you clearly don’t know what you’re talking about.
On the flip side, there’s my son. He’s a “just the facts” kind of kid, so when we start discussing these topics at the dinner table, he always plays devil’s advocate with our daughter. The two of them are sparring partners, as my son recounts specific facts and historical references that sometimes poke holes in my daughter’s argument.
Other times, they’re on the same side of the fence trying to enlighten my husband and I about why it’s important to not characterize anyone by their gender. While we grew up in a “him” and “her” world, my son and daughter recognize the importance of not defining a person by their gender. It’s during these dinners that our children educate and enlighten my husband and I about the ways in which the world is changing and evolving in ways we never expected.
Now that my daughter is in college, we have been spending more time with our son. While our dinner table conversation sometimes revolves around sports, we’ve also been treated to his passion for music, as he’s a talented guitar player. He’s also an aspiring filmmaker so he frequently shares films he’s produced with his writing partner. All I can think about during these dinners is how much I’m going to miss these moments when he leaves the nest next year and heads to college.
There is something truly special about family dinner.
Whether it’s at a restaurant, a fast food joint or around the dinner table, family dinners bring parents and kids together. I love knowing what’s going on in my kids’ lives, but I also want to know their thoughts on the important issues that impact them. While I may share some of my own wisdom, I have learned so much from what they are experiencing and learning in their classrooms and the world around them.
The best way to get your children to talk about the things that matter the most to them is to gather around the table, and just listen. Our children don’t want us to be constantly badgering them about when their next test is or if they have turned in their health form or studied for their SAT (even though we do ask these questions, too). They engage the most when you meet them on their level, talking about the things that matter to them.
It can be difficult to get everyone’s schedule in sync, but as parents it’s important we make an effort to bring the family around the dinner table at least once a week. Once your kids don’t have electronics devices competing for your attention, you’ll soon find out what’s really on their minds.
You may even have a healthy and constructive debate about politics. For our family, dinners have been an incredible way to have a meaningful, eye-opening conversations with our kids. You may be surprised by how much they know, learn what it is they really care about, understand their daily stressors, and maybe even learn a thing or two along the way.
- Teens, Politics And The Importance Of Family Dinner - February 4, 2020